The word of the Lord for me this year is “contentment.” It seems a simple word but the more I look into the scriptures and a Bible study on the word, its complexities and repercussions grow.
I usually write about my word for the year right after January 1st. The monumental challenge of this word grabs my heart and soul. I have come to a place of peace in most areas of my life. Walking with God since 1978 means I’ve had lots of practice. But contentment beyond peace slaps me in the face and demands that my natural self dies anew.
I began life as a Christian a classic type A personality, and a D in the DISC personality assessment. I commanded every room I entered and was large and in charge most of the time. Knowing Jesus has changed me dramatically; the most recent personality assessment showed a balance I once thought impossible. His influence has also made me appreciate and value those unlike me so much more. Instead of being dismissive, I now seek to learn from those different that myself.
Studying scripture and spending time with God privately teaches me that, while He made no mistakes in creating me, growing more like Jesus means changes in my outlook and attitude. Choosing to value and yield to God’s will instead of my own is exceedingly difficult for those of us who are dominants. We’re great at leading and starting; completion and patience are characteristics we must cultivate. Thus, choosing contentment as a way of living is daunting.
Dissatisfaction, especially with myself, has dominated my thought life for many years. Learning to rest in God’s ways and plan has taken me decades. And now He wants to teach me a greater level of trust: To live in a state of contentment with myself and my circumstances, changing at His pace and with His plan, not my own. This flies in the face of doing what is necessary to improve myself and my life. Doing the research to find answers is admirable when in pace and rhythm with the grace of the Holy Spirit. Truth be told, I have struggled to wait on God’s timing since I began to know Him. He continues to teach me patience with almost every breath.
When the word for this year was whispered in my soul, I accepted it; I’ve learned that much wisdom. I am also usually a quick learner. But this one is big, contradictory to my nature to the Nth degree. I anticipate this lesson will take time; I want it to be as complete as possible, since a quiet and gentle spirit has been my desire for myself for years, as I know it is His too.
God has stripped my soul and life of many of the sinful/hurtful habits and attitudes I had when He found me. They hurt those I loved but they also hurt me deep in soul and body. His grace has been sufficient. Now He wants to add to the godliness of living He has made possible, and I can only trust that He will again give me grace to change, trusting in His finished work and not my own endeavors:
I Timothy 6:6 But godliness actually is a source of great gain when accompanied by contentment [that contentment which comes from a sense of inner confidence based on the sufficiency of God]. Amplified Bible (AMP) Copyright © 2015 by The Lockman Foundation, La Habra, CA 90631. All rights reserved.
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