My season of rest and healing continues. I am astounded at the depth of healing I need. I have been listening to old praise and worship favorites via streaming radio. I am struck by how I once thought I was giving all to Jesus for healing and deliverance, only to discover some 20 to 30 years later, there was so much more to expose. The depth and extent of God’s patience to bring us to repentance and change is truly amazing. Had I seen all that was wrong years ago that needed His touch, it would have overwhelmed my soul. But I remember what David wrote and sang:
Psalm 103:14 For He knows our [mortal] frame; He remembers that we are [merely] dust.
Today I marvel that I have brought such brokenness, such woundedness to the altar of God and that He rejoices that I bring it as He reveals it – I have learned to not try to cleanse myself – so that He can forgive, heal, redeem, and restore my body and soul. God once showed me that I am like an onion being peeled layer by layer, until there is nothing left of me and only His nature will remain. I also realize that it will continue until I breathe my last breath or He returns and I am changed with all the saints in the twinkling of an eye, perfected by His hand.
I remember that I, like Moses, asked to see the Lord’s glory when I was a young believer. I did not understand what I asked; I’m not sure now I could be bold enough to do so. But like Moses, God has hid me in the cleft, for me The Cleft For Life, and He shows me the truth of Himself and myself as I am able to receive it:
Exodus 33:13-23 Then Moses said, “Please, show me Your glory!” And God said, “I will make all My goodness pass before you, and I will proclaim the Name of the Lord before you; for I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show compassion (lovingkindness) on whom I will show compassion.” But He said, “You cannot see My face, for no man shall see Me and live!” Then the Lord said, “Behold, there is a place beside Me, and you shall stand there on the rock; and while My glory is passing by, I will put you in a cleft of the rock and protectively cover you with My hand until I have passed by. Then I will take away My hand and you shall see My back; but My face shall not be seen.”
God is faithful to His promises to me. He continues the process of healing and restoration begun so many long years ago. I look forward to what he restores next.
All scriptures from Amplified Bible (AMP) Copyright © 2015 by The Lockman Foundation, La Habra, CA 90631. All rights reserved.
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