Back to basics in The Cleft for Life

I had convinced myself that I knew how God was going to fix a current problem in my life. The answer would have come this past week. It didn’t come the way I thought it would; indeed, it hasn’t been solved at all as yet.

My friend says we look for God to move from the east and He always comes from the west. I’ve found she’s usually correct. This weekend, I began the process of laying down what I had thought I wanted and should hope for and focusing again on Him and Him alone.

It’s a process that happens for me over time and as I face different challenges, it recurs, changing me and my outlook on God’s purposes for me. I have to sit in His presence and reaffirm my choice that His will and His ways for my life are best. Once more I have to choose that, no matter how much my soul yearned for an answer to be the way I wanted it to turn out, I need to yield to the Holy Spirit’s sure teaching that dying to what I want is needful for my spiritual growth.

I must remind myself with regularity that before I was born again, I would often choose what was worst for me. My lifestyle choices before I knew Jesus as Savior were not always healthy. My foundation is different now; grace rules my life. I am acutely aware that the good things in and with me and in my future are from His grace and blessing. He longs to give me all blessings He has planned, but He will withhold some until I can handle what they mean for my life.

As I wrote last time, my mother is nearing the end of her life; she needs extended care for now, and may never live independently again. Her short term memory is failing and my siblings and I now must contact one another for the news of our lives and about her. She cannot be the center of information she once provided for us all.

It’s a time of change and change brings stress; the established habits must be altered to maintain a sense of continuity and family connection. The remaining members of my family of origin live long distances apart; we stretch from Florida to Alaska, from Ohio to Texas with Arkansas thrown in between them all. We all saw each other last summer to celebrate Mother’s 90^th year; it had been 10 years since we’d all been together for her 80^th celebration. And now with her less able to be our point of connection, I’m wondering exactly how we’ll manage.

So it’s back to The Cleft for Life I go. I’ve never stopped making time to meet with God, but I am again impressed with the need to be there to hear from Him and to be reminded that He is the faithful one in our relationship.